Is Breast Best?

A question I have continually asked myself over the last 5 years. Also, a subject that keeps leaping out at me in the last few weeks.

When I fell pregnant in 2007, I was very blinkered - I was going to breastfeed my baby. It was best for my baby and for me. It was free. It was always available. I was sold! I did buy a steriliser, bottles and breast pump, so that my husband could feed our baby at times.

Fast forward to the birth...this was when it all changed. I had quite a traumatic birth (that is another story) and my little boy had breathing problems and was taken to Special Care. He was with me for 2 hours at which time the midwives continuously tried to get him to feed from me. I tried and tried...but he couldn't breathe properly. For the next 3 days he was tube fed. When he was well enough, again the midwives kept pushing him onto the breast...but he didn't want to. This continued after we got home...I kept trying to get him to latch on but it never worked. I expressed as much as I could...but it was never enough.

2 weeks after he was born, I was diagnosed with Post Natal Depression (PND). I went straight onto anti depressants, which I was told could pass over to my milk. That was when we then exclusively bottle-fed.

It took nearly 2 years for me to receiver, and during a counselling session, I found that this whole breast/bottle feeding issue was one of the contributory factors to my PND.

When I fell pregnant with my daughter, I had a completely different attitude. I decided I would try breast feeding, but would not be disappointed if I was unable. Another factor to consider, was I had now developed Rheumatoid Arthritis and I needed to go back onto my drugs quite soon after birth. The decision I had to make was to take my drugs and bottle feed my baby or try breast feeding and if successful, stay off my drugs, suffer excruciating pain and not be able to pick up my baby - not much of a decision.

I must say that second time around there was no pressure in the hospital to breast feed. I tried immediately after and couldn't manage. I had lost over 4 pints of blood and was in a bad way - I was so weak I nearly dropped my newborn baby. I did though receive a few sneering comments from the midwife at the routine check-ups.

There is so much media attention on breast feeding and I get so cross still that Mums are still being made to feel guilty. I recently read of a woman, who struggled with breast feeding, her baby was losing weight and she was persuaded to bottle feed. Following this decision, she became depressed and eventually took her own life when her daughter was 10 weeks old.

So I finish as I started...is breast best for both Mother and Child?